Effective leadership is difficult. It is a delicate balance between making progress, managing expectations, and to be heard. When it comes to receiving criticism from a boss or co-worker, no matter how it is constructive, it can sometimes be difficult to hear, without getting defensive. Most advice for handling it would be " do not take it personally. " Personally, this board makes me even more, angry. Do not take things personally? It was personal! I worked very hard and I got this answer? I have a right to be angry about it!
We
are not shown how not to take things personally because it is difficult and
most people do not know how However, by identifying your ego conversations
can help you to be directed more effectively . Here are some tips on how to do
the next time you feel like the world is conspiring against you
.
Disarmament
acknowledging their views
Having
a boss who gets on your case for not doing enough ? Or, do you feel that your
skill is challenged when you work hard on something , but later asked why you
did not do something else instead?
One
thing to keep in mind is of course you're going to be asked, they try to
understand what you did and how you did. Instead of seeing this as a personal attack,
find a grain of truth in their statements and verbal recognition. For example,
if a boss asks you "Why did you ABC Why do not you XYZ ? " You can
respond calmly, "I do ABC for the following reasons (motivation). But in
hindsight, I think you're right, XYZ would have been a good alternative in the
future is what I'll do. "The key is to remember that this does not mean
that you necessarily agree with them, just let you know . With deliberate
practice , separate yourself from the perceived attack from you, and you have
taken the lead in conversation, rather than letting your emotions lead the
conversation .
Do
not expect people to read your mind or know where you are
The
root of taking things personally is the hope that people should know or do
certain things, but the reality is not responding. If expectations are not met
and there , it can be easy to feel aggrieved or disrespectful and say, "
Well, he should know that ... "
This
is a frustrating truth that nobody "should" know everything and
anything. It would be a fairytale if people could anticipate our every thought
and every need . And we all know that common sense is not so common . However,
be comfortable with it will give us the courage to ask for what you want. This
is a process that takes patience and perseverance , but will make time less
stressful on the road because you expressed at the outset. So, take charge of
the situation by being prepared to remind others where you are with your
progress or vision !
Seek
to understand the other point of view
Defensive
rises from assumptions about the unknown that is believed to be true. Before
jumping to conclusions , ask questions to clarify where the actions or
in actions of others investigations come . If you really put an effort into it ,
you will see that it has nothing to do with you. Maybe the boss wants more
sales or conserve resources. However, there is a series of personal events that
you do not know about that led to their appearance to attack you . However,
your colleague has been trained to think a certain way and it is difficult for
them to accept your point of view. By understanding their point of view, you
will realize that things are not happening for you, they just happen .
Effective
leading requires greater presence and get defensive as it takes . Recognizing
the perspective of another , do not assume what you do not know , trying to
understand and help build a presence that will attract people and growth
opportunities you .
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